Saturday, May 16, 2009

Anxieties abound

With only days to go, I'm feeling very nervous. You see, although it's very exciting to have a baby, surgery is the only way out of this.

Of course there are some great things about a scheduled cesarean section: we have an exact day and time (May 21st at 1 pm MST), and no big surprises. Modern medicine is wonderful - I can have babies without dying in childbirth! However, this is major surgery, and the risk of complications increases with each subsequent pregnancy and delivery. I'm so grateful that they make me stay in the hospital for 4 days, because I need it.

It doesn't help that I told the kids about what happens in the operating room. They thought it was interesting and a bit exciting. Then they went to bed. For the rest of the night, I kept thinking about it and feeling more concerned.

As a matter of fact, in the OR I usually feel so nervous that I talk incessantly to keep my mind off of what's happening. Dominic tells me afterward what I say, and I'm always embarrassed. I can't remember any of it now. But when I brought it up the other day, he couldn't stop smiling at the memories. So I guess it really is that bad.

And then there's the fact that Dominic lost his job. On the one hand, he can really help out getting the baby gear ready, and he doesn't have to take off any time from work. But on the other hand, the lack of income is a bit nerve racking. I'm focusing on the baby and not thinking about it too much at this point, though.

We still don't have a name! Oh, I know we'll come up with something eventually. But just like with Elisa, she'll be Baby for a little while.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I sure am thinking about you an awful lot these days. I wish I were closer and could help, but at least you have Dominic there to take care of things. Troy lost his job two weeks after I had Daniel, and as hard as that was, I think I would prefer it to two weeks before the baby. Who needs that kind of anxiety when they're that pregnant? Hang in there-we love you! Emily

Boo said...

Thanks, Em!